Josie here.

Anonymous asked:

How do you fit an elephant into a Safeway bag? You take the "f" out of Safe and the "f" out of Way!

dutchster:

yang-the-timelord:

somuchtosaybutsolittlevoiceleft:

yang-the-timelord:

dutchster:

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i’m so fucking confused and it’s pissing me off help

Get out da way

i’m so lost wtf
there is no f in way and just how the fuck do you get “Get out da way” from that wtf

exactly there is no f in way

fiyhi:

patron-de-los-santos:

mcdamnright:

So I was at a thrift store and I see this little cat lamp.

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I was like “Aye yo, ya’ll are fuckin’ adorable.”
So I bought the lil’ guy and took him home to plug him in.

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Then I was like “No.”

well no wonder why it was in the thrift store

but shit it was 99 cents

bekstek:

mintike:

IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL NAMED “the fresh prince of denmark yo holla”

oh man, i love receiving unedited final drafts:

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cracks me up every time

iguanamouth:

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i read that as lions

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remember who you are

somethingaboutfandoms:

thefuuuucomics:

I’D WATCH IT

BUT THIS IS LITERALLY PERFECT

(Source: supersuperkawii)

kingkristoffs:

petitetiarasCouples Challenge: Day one
  ↳ Favorite Lady: Belle

theshadowstudio:

The lady who requested this hand-cut paper Belle art decided not to buy it, so it’s officially listed in my Etsy shop!

hellyeahbeautyandthebeast:

Just ordered this Beauty ♡♡♡

(Source: 3-41am)

souljannoying:

"I’ve heard so much about you!"

oh shit

(Source: pemsylvania)

What is love?

(Source: oberynthemartell)

demons-diamonds-djs:

carogables:

The only real life ship that ever matters

Harry ships them so hard you just know it

(Source: georgesus)

lostentirely:

inbox:

ppl are ignoring me like im rob kardashian

who

humansofnewyork:

The woman in the blue coat approached me by the United Nations building yesterday, and said: ‘There is an interesting man around the corner that you should photograph. I don’t know his name, but everyday he stands directly across from the UN, and says ‘God Bless You’ to everyone who walks past. I’ve always sort of viewed him as the conscience of the world.’'Let's go together,' I said, and she agreed to bring me to where he was standing. When we finally found the man, I asked for his photo, and he cheerfully agreed. But he pointed at a nearby wall:"Let’s take the photo under that scripture," he said.

humansofnewyork:

The woman in the blue coat approached me by the United Nations building yesterday, and said: ‘There is an interesting man around the corner that you should photograph. I don’t know his name, but everyday he stands directly across from the UN, and says ‘God Bless You’ to everyone who walks past. I’ve always sort of viewed him as the conscience of the world.’
'Let's go together,' I said, and she agreed to bring me to where he was standing. When we finally found the man, I asked for his photo, and he cheerfully agreed. But he pointed at a nearby wall:
"Let’s take the photo under that scripture," he said.

bullied:

we live in a world where pizza gets to your house before the police.

(Source: bullied)